Tis The Season: Beware of Military Romance Scams

As Valentine’s Day approaches, singles looking for love often turn to digital platforms, and military singles are no different. A simple online search turns up several sites, including MilitaryCupid, USmilitarysingles.com, ForcesPenPals, and more.

But military singles beware: Fraudsters are actively perpetrating heartbreaking scams online.

“Military romance scams are a type of imposter scam where fraudsters pose as service members and emotionally manipulate victims into sending them money, gift cards, or sensitive information,” according to an alert posted on the fraud awareness education platform, efraudprevention.com. “Many fraudsters live in foreign countries and use stolen photos and personal information from real veterans or active-duty service members to fool their victims.”

Data from the Department of Defense-funded program, Military OneSource, shows that while there are more than four million people serving in the U.S. military worldwide, about half of active-duty members are unmarried. Stress, loneliness, and isolation from family and their civilian community can sometimes lead to online risk-taking. In some instances, military fraudsters are looking for vulnerable targets who appear to be looking for love.

“The usual victims are people who show support for the military either through their profiles or by joining Facebook groups or donating to veterans' charities," noted efraudprevention.com.

 “Scammers will 'love bomb' their victims or even propose marriage in a matter of weeks.”

Established in 2004, E-FraudPrevention™ works with banks and credit unions to educate and protect account holders with practical, real-world fraud prevention resources. But their military romance scam alert has some key takeaways, considering it's Valentine's Day season.

Fraudsters Asking For Money

Experts say a tell-tale sign of a romance scam is an immediate ask for financial help.

“In almost every case, the easiest way to spot a military romance scammer is simply if they ask you for money,” warns E-FraudPrevention on its website. 

“Never send money or banking details to someone you’ve never met in person. And don’t believe images of checks they’ve sent you. These can easily be faked.”

Other financial storylines from romance scammers include claims that they can’t access their bank accounts for various reasons; they need money to pay for food or housing; or they need help to get money back to family in the U.S.

Raymond Hagermann, LMSWC, is a licensed master social worker-clinical and a military veteran who specializes in members of the military who may be in need of therapy. He tells Military.com that members of the military can be especially vulnerable, despite their combat training and a tough exterior.

"I think there's really a strong temptation to do the online thing because [as a military member] you already know the people on base. But when you return home to your community or hometown, everything's changed, and the comrades you had a commonality with are gone," said Hagermann. "So it's just easier to go online to meet someone to fall in love. More fish in the pond, so to speak."

But E-FraudPrevention's website says that it can be dangerous.

"While it’s completely normal to feel excited by a new relationship, there’s a difference between legitimate emotions and 'love-bombing,' noted the website. Be cautious of anyone who moves quickly or even proposes before you’ve met. This can be a warning sign of a romance scam. 

Impersonating Another Member of the Military

Another common romance scam, according to experts, is a fraudster impersonating another member of the military to gain credibility and sympathy from an unsuspecting victim.

E-FraudPrevention's website explains, "Scammers build trust by sending you their official military ID. But these photos can easily be doctored to match the backstory they’ve created. Plus, it would be risky for any active service member to send you a photo of their ID, as it contains personal information they wouldn’t want out in public."

Hagermann says younger members of the military often fall victim. "When you're 18, 19, 20, enlisted another, it makes it difficult to relate or even know how to vet a love interest," Hagermann said.

Thin or Non-Existent Digital Presence

Overall, a glaring red flag, according to experts, is a scammer who has little or no digital footprint. If simply googling their name or searching for their social media accounts comes up empty, or with very little information, that could be cause for concern.

Consider these warning signs from efraudprevention.com:

• Low friend count on social media (the average Facebook user has 338 friends)
• No recent posts
• Only the same photos they used on their dating profile
• Sharing strange links in foreign languages
• Multiple profiles with the same name and photos

Experts say the best advice is to trust your instincts and rely on family or friends for help in deciphering whether a potential love interest is real or not. Hagermann says therapy can also help.

"I think everyone could use some therapy, maybe just to talk to someone to think things through," he said. "I know that as a therapist and social worker, I'm biased. "But talking to someone really can help."