More than 34,000 children in military families have been diagnosed with autism in recent years. The trends indicate that diagnoses have been more prevalent in military families than civilian counterparts. Families navigating autism do not have to do it alone.
In this feature, we highlight two remarkable military spouses whose actions are creating impactful resources and personalized support. Both women are advocates in helping military families navigate autism and parents who understand how the military life compounds challenges due to constant interruptions in the continuity of care. Their shared insights come from their own lived experiences, which makes a significant difference in how military families can relate and get the help they need from day one through post-military life.
We first connect with Tanya Hines, Co-Founder and Executive Director of Experienced Autism Alliance, a non-profit founded by Tanya and James Hines in 2019. Their mission is to empower families and individuals affected by autism through resource connection, education, and community support.
Experienced Autism Alliance
Kim O’Brien (Military.com): Your customized support model is rooted in lived experiences and a family-first approach. How does that perspective shape the way you specifically support military families navigating diagnosis, IEPs, and therapies like ABA, OT, and speech?
Tanya Hines (Co-Founder and Executive Director): Our support model is rooted in lived experience, which is especially important for military families. As a military family ourselves, we understand the challenges of frequent moves, long waitlists, and having to restart services over and over.
We take a practical, family-first approach, helping parents navigate what to do after a diagnosis and beyond, feel confident in IEP meetings, and quickly connect to therapies like ABA, OT, and speech in their area. At the core, we provide real, honest guidance so families feel supported, prepared, and confident no matter where they’re stationed.
Military.com: The Experienced Autism Alliance emphasizes measurable progress and realistic expectations. What does success look like for a military family working with your organization, and how do you help them stay on track despite the unpredictability of military life?
Tanya: Success for us isn’t about perfection, it’s about progress. We help families set realistic, achievable goals based on where they are right now, not where they feel pressured to be. Then we give them the tools to stay on track, checklists, key documents, and clear next steps they can carry with them through every move.
Because military life can be unpredictable, we focus on consistency within the family, routines, communication, and advocacy skills that travel with them. Our goal is to ensure that, no matter where they go, they feel prepared, supported, and capable of continuing their child’s progress.
Military.com: "EAA exists to wrap families in the personalized, hands-on support that James and Tanya once desperately sought." This quote powerfully demonstrates how no family has to navigate the autism journey alone. As an organization founded by military parents, how does your lived experience shape the way you design services and engage with the families you support?
Tanya: Our lived experience shapes everything we do. We’re not creating programs based on theory; we’re building what we once needed as military parents navigating autism with limited guidance and constant change. Because of that, our approach is hands-on, practical, and deeply personal. We understand the urgency, the overwhelm, and the need for clear next steps, especially when you’re moving, restarting services, or trying to advocate in unfamiliar systems.
Our services meet families where they are, provide real guidance they can actually use, and walk alongside them, not just pointing them in a direction. At the heart of it, we want every family to feel what we didn’t always have in the beginning: supported, understood, and never alone on this journey.
Military.com: As your organization continues to bridge gaps and support families, what are your long-term goals, and how do you see your organization evolving to support families navigating autism?
Tanya: Our long-term goal is to create a continuum of support, so families are not left to navigate gaps at any stage, from diagnosis through adulthood. We’re expanding beyond resources and workshops into more direct, hands-on support, including social and life skills programs, job training opportunities, and pathways to greater independence for teens and adults.
Programs like our social clubs and SpectrumSqueeze (mobile lemonade stand) are just beginning. We also envision a dedicated center where families can access multiple supports in one place: education, life skills, community connection, and real-world training. As we grow, our focus remains the same: meeting families where they are and evolving our services to reflect real needs, so no family feels like they have to figure this out on their own.
The Mission at Home
We next gather insights from Elizabeth “Tracy” Parent, Ed.S., co-author of the book, The Mission at Home: Navigating Military Assignments, TRICARE, Education, Benefits, and Everyday Life with Your Child on the Autism Spectrum. Her background includes being a military spouse with over 20 years of experience supporting children with autism and neurodiverse needs throughout multiple military moves.
As a skilled consultant and presenter, she has partnered with school districts across the United States and internationally, including in Russia. She has developed online trainings and courses used globally, equipping educators and families with practical strategies for inclusion, disability awareness, behavior management, executive functioning, and educational intervention.
Kim O’Brien (Military.com): The Mission at Home: Navigating Military Assignments, TRICARE, Education, Benefits, and Everyday Life with Your Child on the Autism Spectrum shows other military families how they can be supported. What would you like to share about this book as a resource that makes it stand out?
Elizabeth “Tracy” Parent (Educator and Co-Author): This is a guide that comes from our journey and involves stories families will be able to relate to, but also be guided on steps to take to avoid the pitfalls we encountered during our path. It is a resource that starts at the beginning of the journey, all the way to what to do during retirement and how to plan for your now adult child with autism, since the military days may go away, but autism stays.
So the book helps families along the path from the beginning to long-term planning after careers are over. The book will be a reference for so many different families at their various places on the path.
“We got a lot of help when Bryan was first diagnosed in 1988,” recalled Jaime Parent. “So much so that my wife, Tracy, changed careers and became a special educator to pay it forward after learning from the compassionate professionals who worked with our son. We made a pact that when it was our turn to help other families, we would remember how we struggled and dedicate ourselves to supporting young families the way we were supported a long time ago.”
Military.com: Based on these thoughts your spouse shared, can you share an example of a family where you felt you made a real difference for them?
Tracy: Thanks for this opportunity!! There are many stories I could share, but I’ll focus on one student (name changed for privacy) and his family.
I was a mom of a child with autism, so before we chose where to live when stationed at Walter Reed in Washington, DC, we contacted the local Autism Society Parent Group and asked where the best school system was within a 45-minute radius. We were directed to the Howard County Public School System (HCPSS), in Columbia, Maryland.
We became members of the Howard County Autism Society and felt we found a gold mine. I decided then to apply for a job in that district, having a community that I trusted for our family and one where inclusion and special education were part of their mission.
While teaching at the elementary level in the academic life skills program, “Geoff” entered our classroom during a difficult time. His dad was deployed overseas for a year, and his mother moved in with her parents for support. Because she was working, much of Geoff’s daily care fell on his grandparents, who were overwhelmed and lost on how to support him.
Geoff had high energy, limited verbal language, delayed academics, sensory needs and used behaviors like eloping, yelling, and grabbing to communicate.
We began by connecting the family to the HCAS, which provided trained childcare during meetings, but more importantly, it gave them something they desperately needed – community!! Through HCAS, they met other parents, found trusted providers, attended trainings, had volunteers who would attend IEP meetings, and received help applying for the Medicaid Autism Waiver.
We also guided the family to local supports within the School System, such as HCPSS Family Support and Resource Center for behavior workshops, resources, IEP assistance, and liaisons to help with the special education process.
For their home, we created consistency by providing the same visual schedules and picture communication systems we used in the classroom. That was a turning point. Geoff began to understand expectations and communicate his needs more effectively. Within months, his language grew significantly, and his challenging behaviors decreased by more than 50%. Communication truly changed everything.
We established a simple home-school communication system that employed a lot of checklists, so everyone could easily stay informed and connected. In the classroom, we adapted instruction to meet Geoff’s needs, and he began to make steady academic progress.
To support his sensory needs, we introduced tools like a sensory chewable necklace to replace his shirt-chewing habit, and we helped the family implement safety measures like installing door alarms to address elopement. We also created a positive behavior plan focused on reinforcing safe behaviors with praise and rewards. Geoff always had access to breaks, food, and sensory supports—he was never deprived, only given opportunities to earn or not earn throughout the day.
We trained the family in short chunks of time during after-school hours, so they felt confident continuing these supports at home. We also partnered with a local Salvation Army coordinator to help provide essential items like clothing, bedding, and food.
Military.com: As you draw from personal and professional experiences, what gaps do you foresee in the future that should be addressed? Do you have any additional thoughts you would like to share with military families?
Tracy: Although there has been a lot of progress made, the more things change, the more things stay the same. There continues to be a PCS continuity of care. The interruptions in therapy or services during relocation can be an issue. Pre-approval of services before arrival would be helpful.
The Extended Family Member Program (EFMP) has really become strengthened, but is always up for negotiation during government changes. We need to have funding, standardized support across branches and increases in staff and accountability.
Access to TRICARE means we need expanded provider networks and reduced delays in authorizations. We need to improve on seamless IEP transfer and keep military-specific transition planning going. For families during this uncertain time in our world, we need respite care, mental health services and command-level awareness.
Our families choose to serve our country every day; let's not make them navigate autism alone. Our book aims to provide guidance and support for families to provide support and community.
